Well it has been 2 full weeks of 'proper teaching' and I have to admit I am slightly confused at just how negative I feel about it all. I never feel like I am top of anything. My days are long 7.30 - 6pm most days and I even work after the children have gone to bed! My timetable is about 30% history 40% RE and 30% geography of which I am absolutely gutted about. I am finding it very difficult planning and teaching interesting lessons in the subjects that are not my specialism or even the motivation to be exciting! The pupils are constantly pushing the boundaries to test out the new teacher! God this cant be right? Surely that only after a short time I would feel this low about teaching and wondering whether teaching is for me after all
Any words would be greatfully received.
So sorry to hear that it is such a struggle. Firstly - things will get better. The fact you care about the issue so much shows that you have the capacity to struggle through and get what you want done. I do think you need to set yourself time limits though. Perhaps have a cut-off in the evening such as deciding to do no more work after a particular time. The time issue is very significant - this needs to be shared with your line manager at school.
Your timetable seems to be an increasingly typical Humanities mix which I suspect you never, ever expected to have. Again here I think you need to stand your ground. Explain to your line manager (or SMT etc.) that you understand you have this timetable this year, but you expected to have a history timetable. Currently 70% of your timetable is additional teaching other than your specialism. Of course you should be expected to pick up a few 'other' lessons here and there, but as a minority to your expertise, not the majority.
Are there no additional / existing lessons to take advantage of? You shouldn't be planning all these lessons yourself. The main issue is what you've already identified - you are happy to create innovative, brilliant lessons for history but why should you for the other subjects. Your motivation simply - and understandably - isn't there!
We are still in the early days of term - some students will have only seen you twice. Keep sticking to the basics - your expectations in your classroom. Anyone who doesn't agree with that can leave your classroom. If you need to abandon a lesson to concentrate on behaviour issues and expectations do exactly that. Also ask for assistance - this is a sign of strength, not weakness. Take advantage of staff who have been at the school for a while - get hints and tips and arrange for them to be ready to babysit any students who cannot behave in your room.
Above all - do stick with it. Your NQT year is the most stressful but also the most rewarding. Keep making noises about your dissatisfaction with your timetable, but do your best to deliver your history lessons in the best possible way. This puts you in the ideal position to claim your fair share next year.
You most certainly aren't doing anything wrong - you simply care about your profession. Just remember every day in teaching is different, so it is well worth sticking with it.